When we go through a loss – especially in the first moments/days of it happening, we need to try to keep our minds from drifting into those dark places.
I remember laying in the hospital bed after Briela had passed away. I had visitors coming and going, but in the moments between visitors when I was all alone, I really struggled with the heaviness of my sorrow.
I finally remembered that I had packed my iPod and I began listening to some music. The lyrics that spoke through the songs became a lifeline, and my faith and hope immediately increased.
One of the first songs to play through my headphones was My Lighthouse by Rend Collective. It may seem a tad odd for it to be a song that I repeated a few times since it is more upbeat, but the words really spoke to me and therefore the tempo didn’t affect my opinion of it. Just take a look at some of the lines in the song… You are the peace in my troubled sea… Shining in the darkness I will follow You… I will trust the promise, You will carry me safe to shore. So good. So hopeful – especially when you are living in the darkness and troubled sea!
After I had listened to this song a couple times, the next song came on – It Is Well by Kristene DiMarco. Well, this song very quickly became my anthem, and I probably repeated it at least 10 times (pausing only to interact with visitors). Even now over a year later, any time I hear this song it brings me back to that day and the hope that was stirred up inside of me.
By the way, have you heard the history of this song? I learned about it recently and it amazes me! The author (Horatio Spafford) of the song wrote it after having just lost his son, then four daughters tragically. It’s amazing how something so terrible didn’t bring blame to God, but rather brought Horatio to his knees in worship.
It is interesting though, songs like It Is Well, which for me became such an important part of my healing, might not resonate with another person who is going through the same turmoil. I believe we each need to spend time listening to a variety of songs (on our own, or songs recommended by someone else) to find out which ones will be our songs.
It Is Well certainly has been my theme song through my healing journey, but I can absolutely add others to the list as well – Shepherd (Amanda Cook), We Will Not be Shaken (Brian Johnson), Anchor (Leah Mari), Restore My Soul (United Pursuit) and There’s Never Been a Time (Rachael Skrobot) [This one came much later, and has been solely for declaring the truth, especially when not believing or wanting to]. There have been more as well, but these are some key ones that have made an impact in my healing journey.
Have you found healing/answers/truths through music in your healing journey?
Has it played an important part in keeping the faith?
Let me know in the comments below!